Black skin is thick and lush, sensuous to the touch, like satin and velvet made flesh. There’s only one patch of skin on a white man’s body that remotely compares to nearly every inch of a black man’s skin. The first time I caressed black skin, it felt like a luxury I shouldn’t be able to afford. I craved it more strongly than Carrie Bradshaw craved Manolo Blahnik shoes. That phrase, “Once you go black, you never go back” is all about the feeling of the skin.
And I had the socially acceptable explanation for my craving. I used that paucity-of-available-white-partners rationale to explain my relationships with black men for several years. A white girl in her twenties is often passed over by her white-male contemporaries. She goes younger or ethnic or foreign-born or down the socioeconomic scale or darker or she spends lonely nights at home with her books. Black men are happy to get true loyalty and love from a woman of any race. The laws of the marketplace do prevail. It’s not me, it’s them being the white guys who weren’t after me for love but only for sex, which I was taught by my father to only give when received a security of companionship.
Even in a time when nearly 40 percent of single Americans have dated outside their race, that deliberate seeking of the specific other makes some people, especially black women, damned mad.
Black men are two and a half times more likely to marry a woman that has more than he has, than a white man is to marry a women that has more than he has, But in truth, white men would rather marry a sexually free woman with nothing to offer but porn like sex than a hard working woman willing to give loyalty and a quality life.
The truth is, more than 60% of white men are lame or corn balls. Then their is another 30% that are freaks, sexual weirdos or just plain scary. Of course you have the last 10% that are just sexy, suave and suave but they only date black girls or woman of ethnic background. This is the reason why some white women would rather date black men! Black men are supportive of all woman maximizing their potential, while white men feel threatened. Men of African decent are more fertile than most races. Men of color also are more pleasing to women in bed. Masculinity of their background is always consistent (thug, prep, rich, poor, etc.) with every step in life.
Black men have something white guys don’t have. Confidence in their masculinity, their sexuality. They clearly know they’re men. White men appear to be waiting for the latest sociological research study to let them know if they are men or not.
Yet black men are gentlemen, masculine and leaders something else white men aren't. They make you feel like a woman, both respected and desired. I can let go of my inhibitions, my need to control, when I am with them. How many white men can treat a woman like a lady and ravish her too?
For example walking down the street with a black man is totally different from walking down the street with a white man. A black man doesn't need the latest car to turn you on, but with white guys it's a little different, they feel to need material things to validate their manhood. What's the point of a mansion and you husband can't command enough respect in the world to protect your home?
Analyze the roots of attractions all you want like scientists have done and you won’t come up with a perfect explanation for why women crave what we do.
Desire rises from our depths and is gloriously oblivious to the good opinion of others. Yet I have excepted that I have pretended that my attraction was an equal-opportunity craving, because that seemed like the right thing to do.
Katie Brach
@KatieBrach on twitter and instagram
